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Messages Between My Girlfriend And I That Has Me Questioning My Long Held Belief - Romance (6) - Nairaland 1l152q

Messages Between My Girlfriend And I That Has Me Questioning My Long Held Belief (28465 Views)

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Hahjascho(m): 6:37pm On Jun 12
jubrilELsudan:


I DEY SURE SEY YOUR WIFE DEY BEAT YOU ..........................................................
Lol

If you’re lucky to yet to be married like me, the point is to avoid some battles instead of fighting them.

Know how to pick red flags that may manifest in the future.

Mindset is everything. Also know that you attract what you are.

1 Like

dlaw70(m): 6:38pm On Jun 12
Atasko:
Hi. I had this chat with my girlfriend today and I'm here wondering if I have been having a messed up principle. I personally don't believe in violence. I will rather involve the authority than get physical. While growing up, I have always believed that hitting a woman irrespective of her actions is totally wrong until I was slapped in SS1 by a hot tempered girl. I didn't hit her back but I randomly think about it ever since grin. After that, I decided to always return every assault irrespective of the gender. But now I'm questioning that principle after this convoy. Am I wrong? What will you do in a similar situation?

Na God safe you ,that girl for the beat you like small pikin for house

3 Likes

Unseen(m): 6:47pm On Jun 12
Bonjovi13:


Answer this question honestly. Say you are working at a job you love and you are very well paid. If you have a serious misunderstanding with a colleague( say female, although any sex can do), and that colleague loses her cool and hands you a very dirty and public slap. Would you retailate? I am waiting?

Respond with 2 hot dirtest slap.... Even if she's my superior.

4 Likes

Bonjovi13: 7:53pm On Jun 12
Unseen:


Respond with 2 hot dirtest slap.... Even if she's my superior.

LMAO. Your response says alot about the person that you are. That's okay too. Do you!!!

1 Like

Exjoker(m): 8:45pm On Jun 12
Juliearth:







Exactly! She baited him and he fell for it. Only an emotionally intelligent person can throw such baits. Asking that question doesn't mean she would play out the response she gave. She painted that picture to get your reaction.


Research more about emotional intelligence and you would understand that it goes hand-in-hand with emotional manipulation and that was the blow the op suffered.




Point of correction. Yes, she was trying to manipulate him not to being abused, but to know if he can return the gesture if it happens (not like she intends to tow that path)
I totally disagree with you dear... I agreed that she tried to use emotional intelligence to manipulate the OP but i am really impressed at the Ops response. That is one hell of a way to draw a redline.

If she wasn't trying to carry out that act, then there is no way she will be offended by his response this much.
I can count about 3 different girls i have date who have asked me rhetorical questions like this (though) about whether i can beat my girlfriend or wife if i am provoke to... My response is always "Yes" if the situation warrant me to. ( note i am not a violent person in nature and i am seriously against men who beat or fight women) but whenever i am ask that question especially by my girls, the answer will always be "Yes" i will slap, or beat a woman who provoke me to beat them.

I think it is a good way to draw the redline to avoid adventurism by all these western wanna be girls.

3 Likes

Apostlenathan1(m): 10:01pm On Jun 12
Why are women this manipulative and mostly unreasonable. Cannot just be objective on a completely logical and reasonable 'equal and opposite reaction' law.

If you believe it's not okay to hit me, then don't. How would you believe you CAN cross the line to hit me but it's wild for me to think I'll hit you back?
You smoke?

3 Likes

Unseen(m): 10:20pm On Jun 12
Bonjovi13:


LMAO. Your response says alot about the person that you are. That's okay too. Do you!!!

There's a THIN LINE between Weakness and Gentlemanliness... Endeavour to always spot the difference

3 Likes

Juliearth(f): 10:40pm On Jun 12
Exjoker:
I totally disagree with you dear... I agreed that she tried to use emotional intelligence to manipulate the OP but i am really impressed at the Ops response. That is one hell of a way to draw a redline.

If she wasn't trying to carry out that act, then there is no way she will be offended by his response this much.
I can count about 3 different girls i have date who have asked me rhetorical questions like this (though) about whether i can beat my girlfriend or wife if i am provoke to... My response is always "Yes" if the situation warrant me to. ( note i am not a violent person in nature and i am seriously against men who beat or fight women) but whenever i am ask that question especially by my girls, the answer will always be "Yes" i will slap, or beat a woman who provoke me to beat them.

I think it is a good way to draw the redline to avoid adventurism by all these western wanna be girls.

Your argument is valid, but I believe her reaction still falls within the tenets of her manipulation scheme.

1 Like

JASONjnr(m): 11:06pm On Jun 12
Juliearth:






You failed to understand my point of view. That lady didn't say she was going to physically assault the op. She said that to trigger a reaction which she got. Sometimes,people makes claims that are farfetched and they don't intend to see through with all in a quest to arrive at the truth or even gaslight.

People often do what they carry in their mind.

People ask questions for clarification and simply because they want to know. She asked to clear her intentions....and it's not farfetched from what she intend to do.

Point is, you don't expect the op to agree to walking away from a toxic girlfriend just to please her intentions in the future.

3 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:05am On Jun 13
Juliearth:






The lady didn't tow this path to let her stance known. That can easily be expressed. She manipulated op into knowing his stance on physical assault.

Physical assault as in when he's the victim of assault and the attacker is a woman?

Or when he defends himself by hitting back?

The victim is now the Villain just because he has a penis grin

3 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:08am On Jun 13
dontai:
no matter what.........? Dey play, until she held your bikolo for ten minutes and comot it for you. Your eyes go clear. Don't you know saying no matter what is like given her blank check, what she will write the amount your generations won't be able to pay.

Some men just too mumu. See as those mumu for up dey pride theirselves say they'll never hit a woman NO MATTER WHAT

So if woman carry knife stab them for shoulder, or Use big stone burst their head, dem nor go still Blow am for mouth because she be woman?

Foolish men.

2 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:13am On Jun 13
Mandate1:
I agree with you to a very large extent, except for the latter part you teach your kids to retaliate.

Retaliation doesn't make one strong, it only shows our unpredictable temperament. I will always teach my child to avoid trouble, it does no one any good.

There's always an authority to report to when you're bullied. Most times the consequences of retaliation might consume ones life. Avoiding trouble, especially throuvh physical combat is the easiest route to a peaceful life.

Okoro so when the trouble find your children, wetin dem go do?
Make dem stand dey collect beating? Abi na as dem dey collect beating, dem go report give authorities?

You'll only end up raising weaklings who can't stand up for themselves. When bullies see your weak children, they'll prey on them and make their lives hell. If you like nor use your head, you think say real life na film

1 Like

odinson1(m): 12:16am On Jun 13
Juliearth:







There's a 90 percent probability that she would not. The 10 percent pending is dependent on her temperament

Because you live inside her head? You're just fighting so hard to defend this woman who doesn't want a man to defend himself from abuse if the ab is a woman.

So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back

3 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:18am On Jun 13
Juliearth:







There's a 90 percent probability that she would not. The 10 percent pending is dependent on her temperament

Because you live inside her head? You're just fighting so hard to defend this woman who doesn't want a man to defend himself from abuse if the ab is a woman.

So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back

Use your head. If someone knows they can get away with something if they do it to you, if the opportunity arises, they're definitely going to do it.
The girl was simply asking him to see if he's the kind of idiot who'll stand there and let a woman physically assault him, and he'll just smile and walk away.
Simply put, she wants a man who won't hold her able if she becomes violent in the future. Julie, use your head abeg! 🤦

3 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:20am On Jun 13
Bonjovi13:


Answer this question honestly. Say you are working at a job you love and you are very well paid. If you have a serious misunderstanding with a colleague( say female, although any sex can do), and that colleague loses her cool and hands you a very dirty and public slap. Would you retailate? I am waiting?

Anybody who doesn't retaliate, is only an idiot. You know why?

If that person sees that they can get away with being violent with you, why won't they do it again another time? But if you put your foot in the ground and give it to them back instantly, they'll think twice before raising their filthy hands at you again.

It's just simple common sense.

2 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:23am On Jun 13
DBestDoc:



There is a difference between being bullied and being abused physically.

Every parent owes their child that specific lifesaving skill of self defence. They must learn to be strong and stand up for themselves when no one is there to stand up for them.

Take note!
Retaliation is one thing that scare bullies far away cos they feed on fear and weakness.

That person you're quoting isn't living on planet earth.

People like that raise weak children who can't stand up for themselves. Wicked people would prey so much on those innocent kids who were unfortunate to have been born and raised by foolish parents.

2 Likes

odinson1(m): 12:24am On Jun 13
Bonjovi13:


LMAO. Your response says alot about the person that you are. That's okay too. Do you!!!

If a man in your workplace punches you in the eye, would you walk away?

2 Likes

jubrilELsudan: 12:25am On Jun 13
Hahjascho:
Lol

If you’re lucky to yet to be married like me, the point is to avoid some battles instead of fighting them.

Know how to pick red flags that may manifest in the future.

Mindset is everything. Also know that you attract what you are.

I DEY SURE SEY YOU BE VIRGIN,................................

2 Likes

Juliearth(f): 3:40am On Jun 13
odinson1:


Because you live inside her head? You're just fighting so hard to defend this woman who doesn't want a man to defend himself from abuse if the ab is a woman.

So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back

Use your head. If someone knows they can get away with something if they do it to you, if the opportunity arises, they're definitely going to do it.
The girl was simply asking him to see if he's the kind of idiot who'll stand there and let a woman physically assault him, and he'll just smile and walk away.
Simply put, she wants a man who won't hold her able if she becomes violent in the future. Julie, use your head abeg! 🤦



...

Oh, now we need to pen down detailed comments? Okay, comment deleted, op cannot reason within the tenets of the point of view .
Juliearth(f): 3:43am On Jun 13
odinson1:


Physical assault as in when he's the victim of assault and the attacker is a woman?

Or when he defends himself by hitting back?

The victim is now the Villain just because he has a penis grin




Clearly, my comment is not for your type. Those with common sense figured my point of view. So permit me to delete the reply I gave to your previous mention.
Juliearth(f): 3:44am On Jun 13
JASONjnr:


People often do what they carry in their mind.

People ask questions for clarification and simply because they want to know. She asked to clear her intentions....and it's not farfetched from what she intend to do.

Point is, you don't expect the op to agree to walking away from a toxic girlfriend just to please her intentions in the future.



Yes, that is called testing the waters in psychology. It is a possibility, albeit, farfetched.
dkidd: 4:43am On Jun 13
Juliearth:







Exactly! She baited him and he fell for it. Only an emotionally intelligent person can throw such baits. Asking that question doesn't mean she would play out the response she gave. She painted that picture to get your reaction.


Research more about emotional intelligence and you would understand that it goes hand-in-hand with emotional manipulation and that was the blow the op suffered.




Point of correction. Yes, she was trying to manipulate him not to being abused, but to know if he can return the gesture if it happens (not like she intends to tow that path)

Yeah some of U will always find ways to defend trash.

Emotional intelligence involves understanding and managing ur own emotions and those of others, while emotional manipulation is using emotions to gain control or influence others for personal benefit.

While both involve understanding emotions, emotional intelligence is used to build positive relationships and collaborate, whereas emotional manipulation is used to deceive or control others

1 Like

Juliearth(f): 6:12am On Jun 13
dkidd:


Yeah some of U will always find ways to defend trash.

Emotional intelligence involves understanding and managing ur own emotions and those of others, while emotional manipulation is using emotions to gain control or influence others for personal benefit.

While both involve understanding emotions, emotional intelligence is used to build positive relationships and collaborate, whereas emotional manipulation is used to deceive or control others





Research and personal experiences have shown that emotionally intelligent people are great manipulators. They have mastered the act of mind control and use it at will for their selfish gains. Only a few emotionally intelligent people do not tow this path.

Most narcissists and gaslighters are emotionally intelligent. They know too well about how to string their partners to varying degrees of emotion to arrive at the truth.
Bonjovi13: 6:34am On Jun 13
odinson1:


If a man in your workplace punches you in the eye, would you walk away?

Yes I will walk straight to HR and file a complaint. His employment will be terminated.
But if I had slapped him back. It would be considered fighting and both parties will have their employment terminated.

The answer to my poser is meant to illustrate the fact that it is important for people to restrain themselves even in the
face of severe provocation especially if it will result in physicality.

Prisons all over the world has inmates in them who reacted justifiably so but unfortunately played into the ploy of the devil and their reactions caused bodily harm or fatality.


My point in life you will always need to consider what you stand to lose whenever you have a need to react to a situation.

It is a man's world we know, but society will always take sides with a woman who had been assaulted by a man. If a woman slaps a man, she may be forgiven and the world would think she was provoked or she was defending her rights but a man may lose his reputation and be called a woman beater.

See what is happening to Diddy. That woman may have done or said crazy things to him in that hotel room. But the world saw Diddy kicking and hiting her and that was it. He is destroyed.

If your woman has no value in your life, if she hits you leave the relationship. But if she does have value, teach her a lesson that she will never forget that doesn't entail hitting her back.

You stand to lose a lot when you hit a woman. Has nothing to do with weakness. Infact it reveals strength and character. My two cents
odinson1(m): 6:56am On Jun 13
Bonjovi13:


Yes I will walk straight to HR and file a complaint. His employment will be terminated.
But if I had slapped him back. It would be considered fighting and both parties will have their employment terminated.

The answer to my poser is meant to illustrate the fact that it is important for people to restrain themselves even in the
face of severe provocation especially if it will result in physicality.

Prisons all over the world has inmates in them who reacted justifiably so but unfortunately played into the ploy of the devil and their reactions caused bodily harm or fatality.


My point in life you will always need to consider what you stand to lose whenever you have a need to react to a situation.

It is a man's world we know, but society will always take sides with a woman who had been assaulted by a man. If a woman slaps a man, she may be forgiven and the world would think she was provoked or she was defending her rights but a man may lose his reputation and be called a woman beater.

See what is happening to Diddy. That woman may have done or said crazy things to him in that hotel room. But the world saw Diddy kicking and hiting her and that was it. He is destroyed.

If your woman has no value in your life, if she hits you leave the relationship. But if she does have value, teach her a lesson that she will never forget that doesn't entail hitting her back.

You stand to lose a lot when you hit a woman. Has nothing to do with weakness. Infact it reveals strength and character. My two cents

Lol you will learn one day that when you give people an edge over you, they tend to take it.

If a woman realizes that she can slap you as many times as you want and get away with it, she definitely will. You're NOT in America or the Uk.
You're in Nigeria where the law doesn't worship women that much. It is fair treatment here.

If a woman carries a Heavy block and smashes your head with it, are you still gonna turn your back to her and walk away, or are you gonna defend your life by throwing a punch? Who will arrest you in Nigeria if you defend yourself in a fight? I ask you again, if you life is in danger from a woman, would you fight back?

1 Like

dontai(m): 7:06am On Jun 13
odinson1:


Because you live inside her head? You're just fighting so hard to defend this woman who doesn't want a man to defend himself from abuse if the ab is a woman.

So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back

exactly bro, is like someone asking a lady if he ràpê her, is she going to report to the police, and she said yes. Imagine the man now started labeling her a snitch' for wanting to report sexual mølêstàtîon done by him to her.
And she's trying to convince us that she ain't biased, but she kept victimizing the victim and shielding the intended ab that she didn't mean no harm.

1 Like

odinson1(m): 7:37am On Jun 13
dontai:
exactly bro, is like someone asking a lady if he ràpê her, is she going to report to the police, and she said yes. Imagine the man now started labeling her a snitch' for wanting to report sexual mølêstàtîon done by him to her.
And she's trying to convince us that she ain't biased, but she kept victimizing the victim and shielding the intended ab that she didn't mean no harm.

That's just a typical woman. Always defending rubbish as long as that rubbish is coming from a fellow woman and directed towards a man.

She cannot understand that the girl is trying to see if the guy would allow her have her way with him. The girl is a potentially abusive person for her to ask that question. She wants to see if the day she gets angry and hits him, if he'll allow her or not.

But this woman cannot see that because she either doesn't have common sense, or she's just a straight up liar and defender of abuse.

1 Like

odinson1(m): 7:40am On Jun 13
Juliearth:





Clearly, my comment is not for your type. Those with common sense figured my point of view. So permit me to delete the reply I gave to your previous mention.

Coward come and answer my question in the bolded na grin

You're just fighting so hard to defend this woman who doesn't want a man to defend himself from abuse if the ab is a woman.

So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back

Use your head. If someone knows they can get away with something if they do it to you, if the opportunity arises, they're definitely going to do it.
The girl was simply asking him to see if he's the kind of idiot who'll stand there and let a woman physically assault him, and he'll just smile and walk away.
Simply put, she wants a man who won't hold her able if she becomes violent in the future. Julie, use your head abeg! 🤦

2 Likes

advanceDNA: 8:31am On Jun 13
odinson1:


So if a man asks you if you'll hit back if a man punches you in the mouth, and you say yes you will, and he tries to emotionally blackmail you of being a man beater, what would be your reaction?

Won't you brain tell you that there's a high likelihood that man might be an ab one day? Someone who doesn't want their victims to fight back


Lol.... U are trying to turn the table of fair & logical reasoning on a w0m@n....?? Good luck man

1 Like

dontai(m): 9:01am On Jun 13
advanceDNA:


Lol.... U are trying to turn the table of fair & logical reasoning on a w0m@n....?? Good luck man
logic kè, he go wait tire.
Imagine the the lady calling the intended abusêr an emotional intelligent lady, but if a guy knows his way around ladies, having them the way he wants, she won't said he "got games", naa dog and unprintable names she will be calling him. But now it's men abs like her, she spending all her gaslighting and manipulative tactics to white-washer the psycho of a girlfriend.

1 Like

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